Don't Cry Over Angry Shoppers!

I am sorry it has been a little bit since I last posted. Life has gotten away from us a little at the Hartwig house.  It has been nothing short of the busiest month of our lives this November...and December has been the same.

IT'S NOT OVER UNTIL THE OLD LADY

MAKES ANNIE CRY

I thought I would start by telling the best ten highlights/learned strategies about my infamous first "Black Thursday."  Yep, I said it...We started on Thursday this year and went until dawn.  Five of us set out to get the best deals for Christmas for our kiddos. We came back with the best war stories and presents.
I started by auto-tuning a song about Black Friday every few days to get my strategic shopping buddy pumped up.  If those songs ever make it on the web...she will be a dead girl.

TOP TEN1.  First stop: I find the best little kitchen for Ericka's Christmas present at a "huge store that rolls back prices." The kitchen is outside, so my niece and I have to wait outside in the lawn and garden area in the cold for about an hour and a half to get this and a ping pong table!  The competition was surprisingly fierce!
2.  Our friend who was with us got punched in the nose while in line for a video game for her step-son.  Yes...she even still made it out with the game!!!!  I would go into war with her any day.

3.  An older lady made me cry by yelling at me.  (I am THAT big of a pansy.) My friends then told me to "grow a pair" and quit letting older ladies push me around. SELF REALIZATION MOMENT ALERT!

4.  Even though the line wrapped around the back of the store, Target was the most organized place we went the whole night.  That was the biggest shocker for me!

5.  Whataburger is still the best thing in the world to eat after midnight.  I thought I would have been over that the day I turned 22.

6.  A full store in the middle of the night equals a lot of strange body smells that you just can't seem to get away from.  Crop dusting, body odor, smelly clothes... I was a little alarmed by this!

7.  200+ people cannot fit through a store door at the mall.  I did really enjoy watching crazy shoppers try (and get stuck) at JCP Black Friday morning. See picture.

8.  My breaking point is 3AM, but I was home by 5AM.  I was DONE!

9.  Always always ALWAYS go shopping with your best friends on Black Friday.  Not only were they great to strategize with on getting deals, I had more fun that night than I had in a long time.

10. A champagne toast with the girls is necessary at the end of a night like that.  Just don't let the bottle roll around in the car before you open it...tends to be a little messy.  Just sayin'

After all of the laughs, tense moments and madness... I would totally do it all over again next year, but only with the same crazy-hyper friends.  It was easily one of the funniest nights of my life.

THANKFULNESS

Every day in November, I have tried to think of something that I am thankful for.  I know this little Facebook ritual has made everyone crazy, but in a way...it has really helped me to remember the things that are most important.  This time of year, I tend to get caught up in Christmas shopping, decorating, visiting Santa and over-indulging in amazing foods.  Remembering what I am most thankful for has really forced me to stay grounded and not sweat the small stuff as much.

Stay tuned in the next few weeks for some really funny life moments.  Lots of good stuff!

'Cause I gotta have Faith-a Faith-a Faith

WEIGHT REPORT
Weight Gain Alert!  I have now gained 0.4 pound in the last week.  Truth be known...I ate everything I wanted.  I justified it by the fact that I had been sick and just needed to eat whatever sounded good.  Although there is some truth to this, I still should have fought the urge to eat anything I wanted.  Sigh... Well, the good thing about Weight Watchers is, every week is a fresh start.  I am ready to put last week behind me and focus on a new healthier week!  I say all of this after I ate an entire cinnamon roll from Panera last night.  Small battles...small battles.

FAITHFULNESS

This week, I have been working on faith.  Faith seems, to me, to be one of aspects of life that are hard to describe.  I have faith that the dog will not pee on the floor while I am out running errands.  I have faith that my child will be in a good mood after naptime.  I have faith that my husband will come home to me every evening.  I found my faith questioned this week though when it came to something bigger.

My mother had surgery this week to replace a hip.  To those of you who know my family well, you know that on her left hip, she has had a replacement and two revisions due to a "part malfunction."  You know that each surgery really took its toll on our family and that the this eventually gave way to a breast cancer diagnosis, double mastectomy, multiple reconstructive surgeries and a knee replacement in the last few years.  Needless to say, when it comes to my mother's health and safety... faith is something that I have to work hard at maintaining. 

This past week, I could hardly shake the fear that things were not going to go as planned.  I began to notice that all of my prayers involved phrases like "please just let her get through this and be okay,"  or "please don't let her die on the operating table," or "please just help this all to go smoothly and not be followed by 5 more surgeries."  All of my prayers were fear-based.  I grew weary of my own fearful prayers. 

Where did my faith go?  Why was I so scared?  This time, things just felt a little different.  She was so optimistic about the outcome.  She was just sure they would be able to correct some of her leg problems and she would be able to walk so much better.  With a big smile on her face, my mother told everyone how she felt like this was really going to help improve her quality of life.  As I watched her holding Ericka the day before surgery, I could tell there was just a slight fear on her part too.  How could there not be???  Although she had all of the faith in the world that things were going to go smoothly, she knew it would be another tough recovery road back. 

As I left her house the day before surgery, I began to pray again for my mother's surgery again.  As I prayed, it dawned on me that I was praying for all of the wrong things.  Instead of praying out of fear, I began thanking God for my mother.  For the amazing person she is and the impact she has had on my life, as well as countless others.  I began praying that God would work through the doctor's hands to make my mom's quality of life extrordinary.  Also, I prayed that I have more faith and the ability to rest easily in that faith. 

That night, I slept better than I had in a while.  The day waiting at the hospital for surgery results was a really good one spent playing with Ericka and my father.  She did well in surgery yesterday and is now recovering comfortably.  Although it will still be a long road to recovery...I am faithful that it will not be as rough as the last hip replacement.

I am so thankful to have faith.  I am thankful to have it tested from time to time so that I may learn to be more faithful.  Without faith, I am not sure where life would take me...and I am not sure I would ever want to find out. 

Morel of the story.... Never be afraid to have your faith tested.  You just might find out you are stronger than you thought.

Oh Sweet Sweet Irony, You've Found Me Again

After losing four pounds in two weeks, adding a new workout routine to the schedule and three parties planned for this past weekend, all signs were pointing to this being the best weekend on record.  Well, that optimism lasted until...Friday at about 9PM.  Here is the breakdown of how my crazy roller coaster weekend was derailed by irony.


TUESDAY

Last Tuesday, I was finally placed in a group Bible Study with childcare for Ericka.  I loved it!  It was a really great chance for both Ericka and I to get out there and not only meet some other moms and kiddos, but also gain some great information.  Ericka loved her group.  The teacher informed me that Ericka had a blast, but they could only find two socks and a shoe from her time in class.  Hmmmm.  Not surprising for my child as we own NO matching socks in the 6-12 month size.  I later found her sparkly silver shoe at the corner of 29th and Yale.  Is it gross that I just rolled up, picked it up and put it back in the diaper bag?  It didn't look like it was dirty... When we got home, I put her precious little cereal-crusted face and bare feet to bed and happily went about my house work.   

THURSDAY
On Thursday, I found my child crying in the morning in a lovely pool of her own throw up after having contracted the stomach flu.  As things affect children differently than adults, she ran no fever, and only got sick the one time.  She just didn't eat as much that day for some reason.  We had no idea she had the stomach flu...until Friday.


FRIDAY

My niece, father and I conspired to throw my mom a small surprise party on Friday night for her birthday.  We had everything planned out and all was running smoothly.  All of the food was prepared, Ericka was in a great mood and my mom was so excited.  After eating, talking to several good friends and cleaning up, Danny and I strapped our little girl in the car and headed home.  On the way, my stomach started to feel like something was wrong.  By about 9:30PM, something was VERY wrong.  I started to get sick and it just would not let up!  About an hour after my hell started, it started for Danny.

**See pumpkin carving below for visual.** [1.]

VERY VERY EARLY SATURDAY MORNING

Danny and I had been up all night long sick.  About 3AM, Danny leans over to me and says that he thinks we both need to go to the hospital...words I have never heard my very healthy husband utter.  As I was only about half conscious due to dehydration, I was not one to contest his logic.  Immediately we start calling our parents begging for someone to take us to the hospital.  (We are too cheap for an ambulance.  Those things are expensive to ride in!)  Danny's parents came to the rescue.  His mother stayed with Ericka, while his father ran us in to a hospital that shall remain nameless.

Once we arrived at the hospital, there was NOT A SINGLE PERSON AROUND!  Literally, it looked like the hosptital was closed.  After waiting a minute, I told Danny to sit while I ran back and tried to find someone.  (To those of you who know my husband...do you think he did what I said?)  Danny was really not doing well physically at this point, and just started yelling "HELLO!!!!! IS ANYONE THERE?!?!?!"  Something like ten workers came running from wherever they had been congregating, angry that someone was yelling in the hospital.  This led to a bit of a rough visit that I will not go into.

A few hours, IV bags and a ton of nausea meds later, we finally felt like we could at least walk again.  We sent Ericka to stay with my parents for a few days until we could get our house viral-free.  We then slept for 24 hours straight with one break for water.  I realized that we have pretty much slept through all of the festivities that we had planned to attend. 

Is it strange that I was both sad and relieved not to be tempted with all of the amazing food we had planned for each party?


MONDAY

I am not sure where Sunday went, but by Monday, I was ready to weigh in and see how things went.  There had to be some upside to getting the stomach flu, right?  My weight stayed exactly the same!  How fair is that?  No break!  Well, it took no time at all to realize that I was looking at this in the wrong light.  Weight will come and go, but the fact that my family being happy and healthy is priceless. 

MY WEEKLY LESSON:
1.     I want to say thank you to those who helped us out this weekend, as we would not have made it without you. 

2.     I am so sorry to ALL who I prepared food for on Friday...who might now be hugging that porcelin pony like they are experiencing the end of days. 

3.     No, this will not keep me from putting my child in her Bible Study class.  There are viruses everywhere.  It takes time to build a child's immune system.
4.     Lastly... Be careful what you wish for.  I was secretly wishing that I would have the will power to withstand the temptations of all of the wonderful weekend party foods.  Sometimes you get what you wish for in a less than pleasant way.

Thank goodness for fresh starts and good health.  Here's to a better weigh in next week!

Happy Halloween Everyone.

Works Cited

1.  Photo- Keeping up with the Jenses.  31 October 2010.. <http://trevorandchrista.blogspot.com/2010/10/halloween-parties.html>. Very cute blog and pic!

Positives and Negatives

"When I buy cookies I eat just four and throw the rest away.  But first I spray them with Raid so I won't dig them out of the garbage later.  Be careful, though, because that Raid really doesn't taste that bad."  ~Janette Barber

Today makes week two of my changes.  Although last week was my birthday week and I ate a lot of what I wanted, I have lost 4 pounds total!  At this rate, we could be seeing some real body changes in a few weeks.  Weight Watchers has been a great vehicle for my weight loss and I highly recommend it to others.  This week, our leader asked us what changes we have made in our lives that have led to our weight loss...and what are the things that are still standing in our way of achieving our goals.  I thought I would share those with you in case they may inspire positive changes in your every day choices.

Positive Changes:

1.     Goodbye to Cherry Coke.  I love Cherry Coke like most women love chocolate.  I would drink at least one a day...sometimes two or three depending on how bad of a day I was having.  I started replacing my soda intake with water and iced tea, which drastically cut my sugar intake.  Now, I do still have the occasional soda, but it is maybe once a week at this point.  Ironically enough, what I thought I could not live without, I now do not miss.
2.    Bon Voyage to Fried Foods.  If I have a craving for french fries or hot wings, I now bake them in the oven instead of frying everything.  They are so much healthier, and you still feel like you are cheating on your diet.
3.     Recruit Your Family.  The better the support system you have, the more likely you are to succeed.  This means, if you eat asparagus and salmon for dinner...the whole family does.  I think you will be surprise how much your family will enjoy the positive changes once they get used to them.
4.     I GAVE UP DIETING.  I know that there are ways to lose weight much faster than I currently am, but I wanted to make a life change, as opposed to dieting for a drastic weight loss.  I am told that the longer it takes you to lose the weight, the longer you keep it off because you are actually committing to a whole new lifestyle.  This is the way I plan to live the rest of my life.
5.     Still Splurge.  By denying yourself the good stuff you crave, you will just binge that much more on it when you are free to eat it again.  Here is an example:  I, like most who read this, are obsessed with Starbucks!  I still allow myself one or two drinks a week, but I cut calories by ordering skim milk (sometimes soy) and no whip cream.  Those two steps alone will save you tons of fat grams and calories.

What's in My Way:

1.   Working Out.  I am having a hard time finding the time to work out.  Yep.  I know I need to do it, but between cooking, cleaning, errands, play dates, cooking and cleaning again, family time and trying to relax at the end of the day.... I am just ready for bed when my day is all said and done.  It just isn't high enough on the priority list right now for me.  More to come on how this one gets worked out.
2.   Eating Out.  There are so few restaurants that release their nutrition information that it is RIDICULOUS!  Every time I try to plan ahead when eating out, I ended up getting blindsided by the excess calories and fat hidden in a seemingly healthy dish.  Very frustrating.  There are a few restaurants that are fairly public about their nutritional facts, so I frequent their establishments more often.  Panera being the best.
3.   My Daughter.  I know it sounds bad, but it is true.  The meetings that are close to where I live are all at times that my husband is at work, it is naptime or it is dinner time for Ericka.  It is soooooo difficult to take her to the meetings.  I was asked to take her out of the meeting today because she literally threw a fit in the floor after pick-pocketing the lady sitting next to us and tearing up my booklet.  Even though I packed toys and let her play with my iPhone, I could not keep her in her stroller and quiet.  It is both naptime and lunchtime during the noon meeting and I struggle with what to do.  I actually started to tear up as I left the meeting feeling like there is yet another hurdle in my weight loss that I cannot seem to get over.  This being my biggest concern, I plan to sit down with my husband and see what his suggestions are.

I guess what I am trying to say, is that there are good moments and hard moments losing weight and being a woman.  All you can do is tackle your issues one at a time and celebrate the victories you have already accomplished.  Any step towards a healthier life is an accomplishment in and of itself.

Coneys and Commitments

 

Blessed are those who hunger and thirst, for they are sticking to their diets.  ~Author Unknown

DIET UPDATE

I am so HUNGRY!!!!!  Not just hungry, but fattening foods hungry!!!  I started my diet on Monday, all was going great...until I began to realize that many of my favorite foods would be a nothing more than a calculation of Weight Watchers points that exceeds my daily intake.  I will tell you now...there are not enough veggies and fruits in the world that can fill the void in my stomach left by coneys.  Oh yeah, I would give anything for some Coney Islander as we speak! With my birthday and a fair trip in the very near future, I am working really hard to obstain from all things bad so I can enjoy both occassions.  Dieting is about planning ahead right?

Now, we eat pretty healthy in our home in the evenings, but when it comes to lunch...I love to eat anything naughty.  Being a diet veteran, I remember that it does take a few days to get your stomach used to your new way of eating.  This is usually the place that most people start to waiver.  MYSELF INCLUDED!

This has me wondering if food can be just as bad for you as any other addiction...

For those of you who stay home, you know that having an entire kitchen at your disposal during the day can be just as dangerous as eating out.  I reworked our entire meal plan around a new healthy cookbook that I purchased on Monday.  This means very little red meat for the week, and lots of fish and chicken.  I am crossing my fingers it goes over well, as I married a real "meat and potatoes" man.

The only thing getting me through this week of coney withdrawls...is the fact that I don't want to be an embarrassingly epic fail on here!  (See, this is the extra encouragement I needed)

LIFE GETS IN THE WAY

Another thing on my mind that I thought I would bring up is following through with commitments.  I tend to be one of those people who always says "I am going to work out," or "I am definitely going to start going to try your church this Sunday," and rarely follows through.  If you are like me, you look at your cranky child, tired husband and warm bed....and would just rather ride the day out at home.  I nearly break out into hives thinking about rounding up the family to do something that no one is really into.  Life is messy and just gets in the way of our commitments.

There was a Bible study that I was really interested in trying.  I had been thinking about it for about a month.  The first week that I was unable to attend, it was because my child developed Hand, Foot and Mouth Disease.  Totally legit excuse.  The second time I tried to go, my child caught a cold and we had to go see the doctor about it.  Also...legit.  The third time I wanted to go, we had our daughter's 1 year check up with a doctor that has a three month waiting list.  Yeah, it could pass for legit.  Needless to say, I was starting to feel like this was never going to happen. 

My wonderful neighbor, who had invited me, was still encouraging me to go.  I wanted so bad to cancel yet again after Ericka had been up much of Monday night and Tuesday early morning crying over teething and diaper rash.  I finally decided that this was the week that I was going to go.  With no infectious diseases....we were going to this Bible study if it killed us!  Forget the fact that I did not have time to do my hair (or Ericka's), parked six blocks away, walked in late, fed my child during the service and left early because she was starting to get cranky...I MADE IT!  It was well worth all of the hassle surrounding getting there.

As my neighbor so eloquently put it..."if you want something bad enough, you will make it happen."  This week, I wanted to be at that Bible Study worse than anything. 

Morel of the story....No matter how much of a hassle it is, if there is something that you want, make it happen.  You are your own deterrent and you are the only way to get past it.  Unless your child has an infectious disease.  In that case, KEEP THEM AT HOME!

Up The Annie - Making Changes

Annette Funicello once said:

"Life does not have to be perfect to be wonderful." 

This was said while she was reflecting on her own life's ups and downs, and battling Multiple Sclerosis.  I tend to think it is a great anthem for life.  Imperfections and all, this is your life.  Make the most out of every moment.



Hello everyone.  I am new to this, so please bare with me... As I am sure MY MOM is the only person who will read this first post, it is still an important step to me to get this all out on the table.  Let me introduce myself:

Who Am I?

I am Annie.  A mother to an adorable one year old, wife to an amazing man, housekeeper, errand runner, party planner, social director and family member to both the Fawcett and Hartwig clans.  None of these titles ACTUALLY answer that question!  That is who I am to everyone else in my family, but as for me.... That is a question that is so difficult to answer.

I wanted to use this forum to answer that question, as I know there are many moms that are out there feeling the same way I do.  This past week, I started to really ask myself... "who am I?"
Like most moms, I have become so involved with my own family, that I have almost lost the essence of who I am.  Please do not misunderstand...I have the most amazing life and I am so proud to get to lead it, but why can't I seem to be happy?

A Little Background:

After I had Ericka, my life changed drastically.  There are no words to express just how a child changes you for both the better and best.  Holding her for the first time, I began to see my mother in a whole new light.  To bring a child into this world is no easy task!  Pregnancy, morning sickness, labor, post-pardom recovery, lack of sleep, etc...it is quite a big deal to have a child.  Even though it was difficult, Ericka has made us so happy, it is impossible to put into words.

After a year of changing diapers, working around naptimes, breastfeeding, colds, feeding schedules, etc.  I started to slowly turn into this "frump girl" mom.  You know who I am talking about, that girl you see at Walmart and you are like "what happened to her?  Who wears their sweats and houseshoes to go shopping?"  You know, the girl who never dresses up, never does her hair, wears makeup, or even wears perfume.  I eat what I can when I have a break, drink what I can when I am so thirsty I cannot stand it...and am lucky to get a shower in the evening after everyone has gone to sleep!  Yeah, I said it.  Even a shower is hard to grab these days.  On top of it all, I had started to gain a tremenous amount of weight that I was less than proud of.  Over the course of a year, I had lost myself.

In my previous professional life, I have always specialized in planning and organizing.  I can walk into almost any situation and turn it into an organizational dream...yet I can't even handle keeping myself together while taking care of a baby, husband, two cats, a dog and a house.  Most women can do this while working a full time job!  I started to wonder if there were other moms that felt like me out there.... DISCOMBOBULATED!

One night, Danny and I were talking after Ericka had gone to bed.  What he said really made me start to rethink the way I was taking care of myself.  He had said to me that he was afraid that I was taking no time for myself.  I explained my day to day activities and how the only time to myself was spent working on my list of things to do for the next day.  Tearful, I told him even finding the time to work out felt almost impossible because if I had a spare moment, I just want to crash and eat something.  Being the most amazing husband that he is, he was quick to tell me that he wanted me to take some time just for me.  Go see a movie with my girlfriends, get a pedicure, do brunch on Saturdays, take a long bath in the evenings...just find some therepudic way to relieve the stress of life.

Fastforward to This Week:

Sunday,  while I was making my list of things to do and groceries for Monday, it dawned on me.  I am the only person that is keeping me in this stressed out place in life.  I am my own worst enemy.  I am the person that is eating unhealthy, the reason that I have gained weight, the reason that I don't fix up and look nice.  I am the reason for everything.  I cannot blame my child or busy life anymore for the things I am unhappy with.

Well, that is changing!  Today is a new start for me and I am jumping in.  Well, a little at a time.  What to change first? 
EATING HABITS!  I had already joined Weight Watchers, but had not been attending regularly.  I am  not super overweight, but by losing a few pounds, I am hoping to gain a some of the confidence that I have lost.  Weight Watchers was also encouraging participation in the Dr. Oz Tranformation Nation, which I have also signed up for.  Feel free to take the test, it is a good eye opener!

Feel free to follow along on this journey, as I have no idea where it is headed.  Consider it to be a diary of an overweight, overworked, frumpy mom who is in desperate need of some changes.  Thanks for your time and tune in later this week to see if I follow through!

**I usually keep all of this in a private journal, but I thought if I actually post if publically, maybe I will follow through with some changes.  Accountability will make you follow through with things that you never thought you could do before.**